It is the job of the parent to help their children understand that basic needs are important, but anything extra is a blessing from God. Take it from Lisa*, a mom of three who lives in New Jersey. "When my husband and I go without sex for too long, it can get ugly: strained, snappy and worse," she says. "In our case, sex is cheaper and more effective than therapy." She doesn't have time for a primary relationship, and has two long-term but casual sexual relationships with Jacob and Anthony.

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